Working

I've just got out of another work meeting and as my experience proved before, it was just another unproductive meeting. folks had their own agenda; I know I certainly had mine. 

An agenda of thinking that I'm trap in a monotony of daily routine. Sure, on paper my job sounds good.  I am helping youths from low-income families to be the first one in their family to receive higher education.  I love what I do. However, I hate the bureaucracy that I have to face in order to get to do what I love of helping others - all I want is to have pagmamalasakit. However, my spirit is being broken from the meetings, from the co-workers who are after their own entitlement of western achievements. You can have your fancy titles - Executive Director, Director, or Assistant Director - but at what cost. You claim to be in this job to help the youth, but your first priority is your accumulation of matters associated with the westernized world...

I don't want to be regimented in how to assist in helping these youths.  Professional attire, customer service, or what time I clock in does not dictate my passion to help. I could be in shorts, tang-top, and sandals and still be an expert in getting these youths in the college of their choice.  I will not be defined by your standards ... no daily ironed clothes or well kept organized office can tell me who I am .... besides maybe the cleaner your outside world that you have the dirtier the materials that your are hiding within you...

currently... taking a big sigh and letting go ... breathe in... hold it.... and out...